Prince Harry has been "secretly" serving in Afghanistan since December! Who'd have thought? There's some good pictures of him in his less-than-basic living accommodation, which I can only think is a pretty good experience for someone of his ancestry.
What's hilarious, though, are the Guardian's captions for the pictures. They're along the lines of, "Harry holds his .50 calibre heavy machine gun while sitting on his camp bed".
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Jimmy Kimmel is an American comedian with his own show: Jimmy Kimmel Live! He's also in a long-term relationship with American comedian Sarah Silverman.
Jimmy Kimmel also has a habit on his show of "bumping" Matt Damon every week i.e. he says, "We've run out of time for Matt Damon." On one occasion, Kimmel went slightly too far, actually had Matt Damon walk onto the dais, they shook hands blah blah blah, but then Kimmel said his usual, "We've run out of time . . " Matt Damon went off it!
So, Sarah Silverman, being a good sport, did this to her unsuspecting partner, with hilarious results. And in retaliation, Jimmy Kimmel just aired this on his show on Oscar night. Very amusing. Where will it end?
Happy viewing.
Jimmy Kimmel also has a habit on his show of "bumping" Matt Damon every week i.e. he says, "We've run out of time for Matt Damon." On one occasion, Kimmel went slightly too far, actually had Matt Damon walk onto the dais, they shook hands blah blah blah, but then Kimmel said his usual, "We've run out of time . . " Matt Damon went off it!
So, Sarah Silverman, being a good sport, did this to her unsuspecting partner, with hilarious results. And in retaliation, Jimmy Kimmel just aired this on his show on Oscar night. Very amusing. Where will it end?
Happy viewing.
Monday, February 25, 2008
Too much stuff
I'm in full-on declutter mode at the moment.
A work colleague revealed that he'd sold loads of his books from university on Amazon marketplace and ended up £300 richer. So I was been inspired, during my visit to Newcastle, to look at my bookcases and list all the plays, anthologies, classic novels etc that I'd probably never pick up again. Of the fifteen that I decided I could happily part with (some of which are monster-sized anthologies that will cost well over £2.75 to post), I've already sold three, so I'm hopeful I can get rid of a lot more crap from my bookshelves.
Some things, obviously, aren't worth listing. Some Shakespeare editions only get listed for 1p, and other popular contemporary novels ("The Unbearable Lightness of Being" - I'd keep stuff like that, but I didn't really rate it, if I'm honest) are better off in the local charity shop.
Speaking of which, there's a book recycling bank at Tesco that was full on Sunday. So, the intelligent declutterers had just piled their books on the top. While I was investigating to see if any more would fit in, Ian noticed a Hemingway novel he hadn't heard of or read, so he took it. Is this stealing or not? We regularly buy books from charity shops, as well as donating to them, but is it morally wrong to take a book exposed to the elements? Hmmm.
I'd have taken it too, obviously. Just another form of recycling.
A work colleague revealed that he'd sold loads of his books from university on Amazon marketplace and ended up £300 richer. So I was been inspired, during my visit to Newcastle, to look at my bookcases and list all the plays, anthologies, classic novels etc that I'd probably never pick up again. Of the fifteen that I decided I could happily part with (some of which are monster-sized anthologies that will cost well over £2.75 to post), I've already sold three, so I'm hopeful I can get rid of a lot more crap from my bookshelves.
Some things, obviously, aren't worth listing. Some Shakespeare editions only get listed for 1p, and other popular contemporary novels ("The Unbearable Lightness of Being" - I'd keep stuff like that, but I didn't really rate it, if I'm honest) are better off in the local charity shop.
Speaking of which, there's a book recycling bank at Tesco that was full on Sunday. So, the intelligent declutterers had just piled their books on the top. While I was investigating to see if any more would fit in, Ian noticed a Hemingway novel he hadn't heard of or read, so he took it. Is this stealing or not? We regularly buy books from charity shops, as well as donating to them, but is it morally wrong to take a book exposed to the elements? Hmmm.
I'd have taken it too, obviously. Just another form of recycling.
Not that I care, but . . .
Edith Bowman is pregnant. I care so little, in fact, that I've only just discovered this despite it being announced 0n 19th Dec. What does leave me perturbed is the idea of an annoying DJ with shit music taste producing a child with a God-awful untalented idiot from whinge-band and No. 1 Interpol-rip-off-merchants The Editors. Ugh.
What is going to become of a child with such a genetic disadvantage?
What is going to become of a child with such a genetic disadvantage?
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
World Events
We're living in strange times.
Kosovo declares independence. I would like to take this opportunity to say that I recognise Kosovo as an independent state and that the Russian and Chinese governments can go sulk in the corner. Not abiding by international law my arse!
Castro resigns. What's going to happen next? Do they have a whole array of mini-Communists ready to take over? Or is Cuba going to make friends (and trade deals) with Hillary/Barrack/John? Let's face it though: Castro is one of those people who is so associated with the 60s iconism (not a word, but I can't think what I mean), that it's almost nostalgic to realise he's still alive. Like Dylan, he should already be dead, in a way.
Musharraf admits defeat. An end to power-hungry dictatorships in Pakistan? I suppose a coalition government makes it difficult to be as corrupt, but it seems unlikely that this is the end of the trouble.
And in local news:
Mohamed Al Fayed calls Prince Phillip a "racist" and a "Nazi". Same old.
Kosovo declares independence. I would like to take this opportunity to say that I recognise Kosovo as an independent state and that the Russian and Chinese governments can go sulk in the corner. Not abiding by international law my arse!
Castro resigns. What's going to happen next? Do they have a whole array of mini-Communists ready to take over? Or is Cuba going to make friends (and trade deals) with Hillary/Barrack/John? Let's face it though: Castro is one of those people who is so associated with the 60s iconism (not a word, but I can't think what I mean), that it's almost nostalgic to realise he's still alive. Like Dylan, he should already be dead, in a way.
Musharraf admits defeat. An end to power-hungry dictatorships in Pakistan? I suppose a coalition government makes it difficult to be as corrupt, but it seems unlikely that this is the end of the trouble.
And in local news:
Mohamed Al Fayed calls Prince Phillip a "racist" and a "Nazi". Same old.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
How to make a imperfect quilt . . .
Ian was saying that long-term projects are good to have. This was in relation to my "quilt"-making, which I started on about Winter 2006 . . . I think, and which I'm hoping to complete this week. (I say "quilt", by the way, because the smallest pieces are actually 17 cm x 17 cm, so it's easily machinable, and not creating some intricate flowery pattern or anything of that kind.)
I understand what he means - it's nice to have a work in progress; something you can keep coming back to, rather than something which is two-days' work and then complete. Maybe the satisfaction over a long-term project is greater too.
But to me, creative pursuits can quickly turn into imagination-crippling, torturous tasks that I find boring to get on with. I'm lazy, I suppose. I like ideas, but once I start doing something and they don't live up to my mental image, I quickly begin something else and leave whatever it was incomplete, preferring to follow flitting flights of fancy rather than spend time problem-solving.
The frustrations of perfectionism or just laziness? Probably both. Anyway, I'm definitely not being a perfectionist over this quilt. It's full of flaws on the reverse side (as I'm sewing all the diagonals across the top), but I don't care. As some musician said about something or other, "You can't pay for mistakes like those."
If only I believed that and wasn't actually extremely irritated by all the mistakes . . .
Pictures soon.
I understand what he means - it's nice to have a work in progress; something you can keep coming back to, rather than something which is two-days' work and then complete. Maybe the satisfaction over a long-term project is greater too.
But to me, creative pursuits can quickly turn into imagination-crippling, torturous tasks that I find boring to get on with. I'm lazy, I suppose. I like ideas, but once I start doing something and they don't live up to my mental image, I quickly begin something else and leave whatever it was incomplete, preferring to follow flitting flights of fancy rather than spend time problem-solving.
The frustrations of perfectionism or just laziness? Probably both. Anyway, I'm definitely not being a perfectionist over this quilt. It's full of flaws on the reverse side (as I'm sewing all the diagonals across the top), but I don't care. As some musician said about something or other, "You can't pay for mistakes like those."
If only I believed that and wasn't actually extremely irritated by all the mistakes . . .
Pictures soon.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Some days you wake up feeling inspired; everything captures your imagination. (No doubt this is in no small part related to the fact that my half term has commenced and I have room to think about creative things.) Unfortunately I'm too hungover to do much about anything.
I've just read about Art Sheffield in the Guide which I ridiculously have heard nothing about. There's also an amazing idea in the Guide: Sarah Kane's play Blasted being performed for audiences of only 12 at a time in a hotel room. Excellent concept. Looks like there might be some stuff worthwhile seeing in Newcastle too, art-wise. (Usually I end up at the Baltic in between exhibitions . . . )
More vitamin C required . . . despite the fact that (look away, I'm going to be crude) I drank so much cranberry juice last night that I swear my wee smelt of it this morning. Five-a-day overload.
I've just read about Art Sheffield in the Guide which I ridiculously have heard nothing about. There's also an amazing idea in the Guide: Sarah Kane's play Blasted being performed for audiences of only 12 at a time in a hotel room. Excellent concept. Looks like there might be some stuff worthwhile seeing in Newcastle too, art-wise. (Usually I end up at the Baltic in between exhibitions . . . )
More vitamin C required . . . despite the fact that (look away, I'm going to be crude) I drank so much cranberry juice last night that I swear my wee smelt of it this morning. Five-a-day overload.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Saturday, February 09, 2008
Oblique Strategy of the day
"Is the information correct?"
Hmm . . . apparently not.
I've discovered through Facebook that my sister has split up with her boyfriend. Bizarre. And quite depressing. In fact, I think I've found out about a few people's relationship endings and get-togethers through Facebook . . .
Hmm . . . apparently not.
I've discovered through Facebook that my sister has split up with her boyfriend. Bizarre. And quite depressing. In fact, I think I've found out about a few people's relationship endings and get-togethers through Facebook . . .
Saturday, February 02, 2008
Speaking of Genius . . .
. . . I solved Derren Brown's horse racing "System" about 5 minutes into the programme.
It was all one big probability tree.
Easy.
It was all one big probability tree.
Easy.
Friday, February 01, 2008
P.S.
This actually reminds me of one of those crap "Genius" programmes on Channel 5 that me, Ed and Linda laughed our way through. One particular "genius" became an amazing painter (despite having had no previous artistic leanings) having strained so hard on the toilet that he gave himself an embolism, after which he was unable to cease painting with oils! Pure TV gold. The "tragedy" of his story was that there was no room in his house for the number of canvases he was producing. Gutted.
Newsnight FUCKING HILARIOUS!
OMG. As I type, the main feature on Newsnight is the side-effects to a particular brand of drugs for Parkinsons. Apparently, several people (seven, in fact) became addicted to gambling, but one of these patients became a compulsive poet, unable to cease writing the shitest poems day and night! Oh my God. A crap-poetry-writing addiction. You couldn't make it up.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Jeremy Beadle RIP
Is it just me, or does there really seem to have been a disconcertingly high number of deaths recently?
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Jess is a "Good Girl"
Yes, so I have been declared by the deputy head (JD, as he will now be known) at my school. I'm so proud, and didn't feel in the least bit patronised or undermined as a young woman. (I'm not being thoroughly sarcastic there, but obviously there is more than a small trace.)
I earned the accolade by compiling a "dossier" of YouTube videos created by kids at my school, which I stumbled upon after suspecting some bullying videos were on there. Most of the videos (shot on mobile phones, which are BANNED at school - this, I suspect, is the reason JD has taken it so seriously. He sees children flouting the rules as making a personal attack on him.) were just extremely stupid: kids being silly on the bus; kids egging each other on to drink muddy water from a puddle; etc etc. But two were disturbingly vindictive and aimed at one particular, ginger kid in my Year 9 class.
Stupid kids.
Hilariously, I found myself in the predicament of having to explain why I'd set my Year 10 the homework task of watching a video on YouTube and analysing the use of Gothic features. No, it wasn't the fact that they were on YouTube, it was the term "Gothic". Not only did the word remind JD of those horrible kids called "Goths", but he was worried about the repercussions of studying anything Gothic in a Catholic school. I had to then explain why "Frankenstein" has extremely Christian themes, that the kids are very aware of these, and that they need to explore the social and historical context of the novel in order to achieve a good mark for their coursework. JD seemed satisfied by this, saying that he had no idea what it was about.
It was only when I walked back into the English workroom that a colleague pointed out that this conversation had taken place around the corner from my gory display: the background is black, there's a border of red paper made to resemble dripping blood, and HORROR written in Chiller font.
It's funny having to justify this kind of stuff. The fact that kids love it and therefore engage with it doesn't seem to be enough. But the idea that classic texts and even Shakespeare texts need explanation is ludicrous.
As an introduction to Macbeth, my Year 8 class were talking about superstitions. One girl mentioned that she and some friends had tried the "bloody Mary" thing and done an Ouija board. After talking about it in depth (haha), I advised the class to never mention any of their dealings with evil spirits to anyone in the senior team . . .
Another member of my department remarked that if her daughter had to read The DaVinci Code, she's definitely complain. Not because she's Catholic and doesn't agree with its content, she added, but because it's so shit.
Spot on.
I earned the accolade by compiling a "dossier" of YouTube videos created by kids at my school, which I stumbled upon after suspecting some bullying videos were on there. Most of the videos (shot on mobile phones, which are BANNED at school - this, I suspect, is the reason JD has taken it so seriously. He sees children flouting the rules as making a personal attack on him.) were just extremely stupid: kids being silly on the bus; kids egging each other on to drink muddy water from a puddle; etc etc. But two were disturbingly vindictive and aimed at one particular, ginger kid in my Year 9 class.
Stupid kids.
Hilariously, I found myself in the predicament of having to explain why I'd set my Year 10 the homework task of watching a video on YouTube and analysing the use of Gothic features. No, it wasn't the fact that they were on YouTube, it was the term "Gothic". Not only did the word remind JD of those horrible kids called "Goths", but he was worried about the repercussions of studying anything Gothic in a Catholic school. I had to then explain why "Frankenstein" has extremely Christian themes, that the kids are very aware of these, and that they need to explore the social and historical context of the novel in order to achieve a good mark for their coursework. JD seemed satisfied by this, saying that he had no idea what it was about.
It was only when I walked back into the English workroom that a colleague pointed out that this conversation had taken place around the corner from my gory display: the background is black, there's a border of red paper made to resemble dripping blood, and HORROR written in Chiller font.
It's funny having to justify this kind of stuff. The fact that kids love it and therefore engage with it doesn't seem to be enough. But the idea that classic texts and even Shakespeare texts need explanation is ludicrous.
As an introduction to Macbeth, my Year 8 class were talking about superstitions. One girl mentioned that she and some friends had tried the "bloody Mary" thing and done an Ouija board. After talking about it in depth (haha), I advised the class to never mention any of their dealings with evil spirits to anyone in the senior team . . .
Another member of my department remarked that if her daughter had to read The DaVinci Code, she's definitely complain. Not because she's Catholic and doesn't agree with its content, she added, but because it's so shit.
Spot on.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Heath Ledger is dead
It's hard to comprehend this:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/23/movies/23ledger.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/23/movies/23ledger.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Me on YouTube
I've gotten round to making myself a YouTube profile, so if you're on there, please befriend me: my username is ELSPECTRE82. I've already favourited (a neologism?) loads of cool and not-so-cool videos, and maybe one day in the future I'll get round to making some grainy montages of my own, complete with 80s-style-graphics and a terrible soundtrack, perhaps dedicated to my favourite hunk actor . . . that being the manner of most YouTubers.
Now I'm going to reheat yesterday's Chinese takeaway . . .
Tim Burton and Johnny Depp on The Culture Show tonight (I've never seen Tim Burton doing an interview before), and also the second episode of the new series of ER - maybe Saturday night TV is looking up?
Now I'm going to reheat yesterday's Chinese takeaway . . .
Tim Burton and Johnny Depp on The Culture Show tonight (I've never seen Tim Burton doing an interview before), and also the second episode of the new series of ER - maybe Saturday night TV is looking up?
Leave Dandy Dan alone!
Someone keeps coming to my blog through a Dandy Dan referral, and it's freaking me out. Why would someone be so obsessed by a picture of Dandy Dan?
If that's not it, then why not just bookmark http://troutinthemilk.blogspot.com?
It's weird, how people stumble across your rantings and ravings . . .
If that's not it, then why not just bookmark http://troutinthemilk.blogspot.com?
It's weird, how people stumble across your rantings and ravings . . .
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